…the sort of thing you’d expect from the likes of us maybe but Bloomberg? Worth drawing your attention to for the entertainment factor though. Fitting gags like, “There’s no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live” or “When Chuck Norris talks everybody listens. And dies”, into the context of finance? Here’s how:

Bloomberg: Chuck Norris keeps a pet vampire squid in his bathtub. He feeds it $100 bills that U.S. Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner passed to him in a plain brown envelope marked “American International Group Inc. Credit-Default Swaps Settlement at Par — Open In Case of Emergency.”

Chuck Norris would NEVER dry heave in times of stress.

Chuck Norris trades Repo 105 transactions with the Federal Reserve, except Chuck only pays 104, and his U.S. auditors have signed off on them as true sales.

More> (there’s plenty of it)

One question left to answer, who is the Chuck Norris of finance?